Saturday, February 20, 2016

Prob #3: Twixt D and F

The Po(e)m:

Not_s to S_lf

I thought it would be good for me
but I find:
No fr__dom, no lib_rty, no _quality.

I stand and say: hot dog!
with mustard
but no k_tchup? no r_lish?
I grow melancholy
despondent
somber
sad.
It is tasty but not
d_licious.

Synonyms for r_d?
-       crimson (too bloody)
-       burgundy (too musty)
-       fuchsia (too flashy)
-       maroon (cast-away?)
-       ruby (Wiz. of Oz?)
(not: carmin_; scarl_t; v_rmillion)

I could adopt most _xpl_tiv_s,
if I want to,
but I won’t.
I can say: thank you!
but not please.

I thought it would b_ good for m_
but I find:
I can, I
can swim and drown, but not liv_ and
breathe.

~~~
The Proce(ss):

Initially, I tried writing a poem without worrying about the letter “E” (a great letter, by the way), with the goal of going back to edit after the fact. But after I began to write, I couldn’t ignore the chief objective. I decided to face the vacancy head-on, rather than trying to avoid the letter altogether. I varied between leaving a __ in place of each “E” and writing the full word with a --- through it. The choice to do __ rather than --- ? Fairly arbitrary, but I favor each word with the --- (aka --- = crucial word). I’ve long known the importance of “E.” Endeavoring to omit it only proved that importance.

P.(S). Writing without u(s)ing the l(e)tter(s) (e) & (s) i(s) hard.

- (E)li(ss)a

11 comments:

  1. This poem is really awesome and I think its cool how the way you wrote your poem highlights the frequency that the letter "e" is used. I like how you shows that an "e-less" synonym for a word, can sometimes be either too simple or too complex and doesn't convey exactly what you want it to. I also like how you talk about things you can't have or can't experience without the letter "e". I think your process of writing an "e-less" poem really interesting and I liked the variation of how you omitted the e's in the poem.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love that you approached the problem head-on in a kind of surreal way. Also, the ~control~ in this poem is amazing, eg. when you notice that you can use most expletives and don't. The repetition of "I thought it would be good for me" is very well placed and I like that it's different than before, like the e-less narrative changed things somehow. Just the images in this poem, it's a rly fun and expansive read.
    Gr_at work, _!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow. The explanation of the process was quite illuminating for me. You made it sound so seamless and natural that a reader wouldn't notice the lack of the letter S if they didn't already know the task. That shows that you could have definitely come up with a great poem without using the letter E at all, but I really like what you chose to do instead. As Ally mentioned, it really demonstrates the high frequency of the letter E but also reveals a very important and somewhat philosophical facet of all languages: that there are so many words that mean nearly the same thing as another, but there are so many subtle and nuanced differences that sometimes you really just can't do with any other word. This was so fun to read! Also, I love the title :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Really clever way to approach this prompt, nice job! I'm not sure what to say, really; besides this being a great stand-alone poem, it has a very sly air about it in the way you sort of flipped the prompt over and messed with it. As well, its very playful at times, which definitely aids that sense of ignoring the "rule" of the prompt. Great response, this is really dope!
    Also I especially love the lines "I can, I can swim and drown, but not liv(e) and br(e)ath(e)." very understated but they do the poem a lot of justice as good mic-drop sort of final words.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I agr__ with Clara that your approach to the po_m, flipping it on its h_ad wh_r_ you hint at words with _ but omit th_m is v_ry cl_v_r. If I was forc_d to analyz_ this po_m I'd sp_culat_ that it was d_sign_d as a "don't *insert strike through* compromise yourself *end strike through*" sort of moral. This is _sp_cially pr_s_nt in your od_ to the diff_ring r_ds. That was c_rtainly my favorit_ part. Anoth_r gr_at _xampl_ of your us_ of *insert strike through* strike *end strike through* through was synonyms for sad. That was highly amusing. Thank you Lissa!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I found this approach to the problem to be particularly interesting. The poem itself, with its strikethroughs and blanks, is a commentary that laments being unable to use the letter e. While technically staying within the problem's constraints, the poem is a creative way to challenge the problem itself. I'll say that your solution obeys the spirit of the problem, not the letter :3

    ReplyDelete
  7. I think this turned out really well. I like that you adopted a similar strategy to Madi, but your poems turned out quite different (though with a similar experimental and avant-garde feel). I love the cross-outs and the list.

    I agree that "E" is an especially excellent letter. xo, EM

    ReplyDelete
  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I can imagine how torn you were approaching this problem, considering that your name includes both letters. I really enjoyed your hot dog metaphor, it's humorous and makes a lot of sense. Replacing words with "e" was also a tactic of mine but it only worked so well. I didn't even consider omitting the letters now that I think about it. Nice job, Elissa!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Agreeing with everyone else, I am blown away by this poem. It was far more intriguing than I expected. What I expected to be an awkward collection of words turned out to be some of the most powerful poetry I've read. I think that is because of the unique strategies you employed to discuss language and the use of illegal (e) was well placed. I would not have thought to do that. Good work!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Agreeing with everyone else, I am blown away by this poem. It was far more intriguing than I expected. What I expected to be an awkward collection of words turned out to be some of the most powerful poetry I've read. I think that is because of the unique strategies you employed to discuss language and the use of illegal (e) was well placed. I would not have thought to do that. Good work!

    ReplyDelete